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Whenever I bring a new girlfriend home, sis has to make the ultimate power move.

Whenever I bring a new girlfriend home, sis has to make the ultimate power move.

No matter the reason she tells my mom, aunty has only one thing in mind when she calls me over now.

No matter the reason she tells my mom, aunty has only one thing in mind when she calls me over now.

Mom kept nagging me about when I was getting married, so as a joke, I proposed to her. It turned out better than I expected.

Mom kept nagging me about when I was getting married, so as a joke, I proposed to her. It turned out better than I expected.

Whenever I go to check on my daughter, she replies

Whenever I go to check on my daughter, she replies "I could be better, daddy."

Even in our shallow, inflatable home pool, I think my sister and I will make a few splashes this summer.

Even in our shallow, inflatable home pool, I think my sister and I will make a few splashes this summer.

The problem with ever-escalating dares with my sister is, I'll actually do them.

The problem with ever-escalating dares with my sister is, I'll actually do them.

While her mother works late, my daughter thinks up more interesting ways to pass the time.

While her mother works late, my daughter thinks up more interesting ways to pass the time.

While my sister rushes in the morning, I just enjoy the view.

While my sister rushes in the morning, I just enjoy the view.

When sis signed up for the class I'm TA'ing, she knew just what extra assignments to ask for.

When sis signed up for the class I'm TA'ing, she knew just what extra assignments to ask for.

I'm already glad my aunt came to visit for the summer.

I'm already glad my aunt came to visit for the summer.

With my sister back at home, every day feels like a vacation.

With my sister back at home, every day feels like a vacation.

In case my sister doesn't believe how NYE really ended, I can prove it.

In case my sister doesn't believe how NYE really ended, I can prove it.

Auntie Rosalinda put me to work on Boxing Day.

Auntie Rosalinda put me to work on Boxing Day.

After salsa lessons, aunty offered to show me the horizontal tango.

After salsa lessons, aunty offered to show me the horizontal tango.

My aunt has a thing for old-fashioned cocktails, old-fashioned décor, and old-fashioned inbreeding.

My aunt has a thing for old-fashioned cocktails, old-fashioned décor, and old-fashioned inbreeding.

As the temperatures drop, mom needs even more help staying warm by the pool.

As the temperatures drop, mom needs even more help staying warm by the pool.

Daddy's little elves are already warming up for Christmas Eve.

Daddy's little elves are already warming up for Christmas Eve.

Fewer questions arise when I visit my cousin through the garden entrance.

Fewer questions arise when I visit my cousin through the garden entrance.

The Tuscan sun looks good on my sister.

The Tuscan sun looks good on my sister.

At the last pool party of the summer, I finally convinced my sister to FreeTheNipple.

At the last pool party of the summer, I finally convinced my sister to FreeTheNipple.

My aunt has a thing for old-fashioned cocktails, old-fashioned décor, and old-fashioned inbreeding.

My aunt has a thing for old-fashioned cocktails, old-fashioned décor, and old-fashioned inbreeding.

No matter how long my sister can stare at herself in the mirror, I can stare longer.

No matter how long my sister can stare at herself in the mirror, I can stare longer.

The years of practice didn't truly pay off until my daughter confessed she was my biggest fan.

The years of practice didn't truly pay off until my daughter confessed she was my biggest fan.

My half-sister usually picks the game we play, but I pick the rules.

My half-sister usually picks the game we play, but I pick the rules.

Jeggings are an abomination, so I'm always asking to take them off my sister.

Jeggings are an abomination, so I'm always asking to take them off my sister.

Whenever my sisters ask me to pick between two styles, I always like both.

Whenever my sisters ask me to pick between two styles, I always like both.

When mom and sis team up, they give me the best birthday presents.

When mom and sis team up, they give me the best birthday presents.

When I finally arranged to meet my long-lost half-sister in Vietnam, I had no idea about her line of work. After I found out her truth, I couldn't confess mine until I ran out of money.

When I finally arranged to meet my long-lost half-sister in Vietnam, I had no idea about her line of work. After I found out her truth, I couldn't confess mine until I ran out of money.

Mom likes it when I hug her from the back, too.

Mom likes it when I hug her from the back, too.

When mommy started paying me as her personal assistant, she expected me to act like one, too.

When mommy started paying me as her personal assistant, she expected me to act like one, too.

New Year's Eve's the perfect time to throw a masquerade ball, where sibling-couples can be themselves in front of one and all.

New Year's Eve's the perfect time to throw a masquerade ball, where sibling-couples can be themselves in front of one and all.

I may only have ten minutes between online classes, but mom makes sure I get the most out of them.

I may only have ten minutes between online classes, but mom makes sure I get the most out of them.

When my cousin invited me over to try out their new jacuzzi, she told me to leave my bathing suit at home.

When my cousin invited me over to try out their new jacuzzi, she told me to leave my bathing suit at home.

The fun cousin gets invited over more.

The fun cousin gets invited over more.

Before even arriving at the first hotel, sis wanted to start bonding on our summer road trip.

Before even arriving at the first hotel, sis wanted to start bonding on our summer road trip.

I may only have ten minutes between online classes, but mom makes sure I get the most out of them.

I may only have ten minutes between online classes, but mom makes sure I get the most out of them.

If sis and I are going to be naughty, might as well really go for it.

If sis and I are going to be naughty, might as well really go for it.

Big sis promised to get me in shape this school year, no matter what it takes.

Big sis promised to get me in shape this school year, no matter what it takes.

Mom has never been shy about showing her affection at home.

Mom has never been shy about showing her affection at home.

The Tuscan sun looks good on my sister.

The Tuscan sun looks good on my sister.

Fewer questions arise when I visit my cousin through the garden entrance.

Fewer questions arise when I visit my cousin through the garden entrance.

Mom's always saying: two is the perfect number of sons.

Mom's always saying: two is the perfect number of sons.

I pray it's a sign that my sister isn't closing the bathroom door anymore.

I pray it's a sign that my sister isn't closing the bathroom door anymore.

My aunt has a thing for old-fashioned cocktails, old-fashioned décor, and old-fashioned inbreeding.

My aunt has a thing for old-fashioned cocktails, old-fashioned décor, and old-fashioned inbreeding.

When my daughter wants to spend the night in my room, she knows PJs won't cut it.

When my daughter wants to spend the night in my room, she knows PJs won't cut it.

I may only have ten minutes between online classes, but mom makes sure I get the most out of them.

I may only have ten minutes between online classes, but mom makes sure I get the most out of them.

As we got older, my sister and I replaced Saturday morning cartoons with another tradition.

As we got older, my sister and I replaced Saturday morning cartoons with another tradition.

Aunty knows I can keep a secret.

Aunty knows I can keep a secret.

Beaches are nice, but my sister and I prefer the privacy of an indoor pool.

Beaches are nice, but my sister and I prefer the privacy of an indoor pool.

She may have been naughty this year, but Santa won't be withholding from my daughter.

She may have been naughty this year, but Santa won't be withholding from my daughter.

Given how much she squirts, it's essential my sister stay hydrated.

Given how much she squirts, it's essential my sister stay hydrated.

Once I told her it was for a photography project, mom was more willing to pose the way I had dreamed.

Once I told her it was for a photography project, mom was more willing to pose the way I had dreamed.

Mom likes it when I hug her from the back, too.

Mom likes it when I hug her from the back, too.

It's cute to see my sister's loser boyfriend clean up after I finish with her.

It's cute to see my sister's loser boyfriend clean up after I finish with her.

"This is the part where you get undressed too, nephew."

When my cousin moved to the city, I told her how she could stay at my apartment for free.

When my cousin moved to the city, I told her how she could stay at my apartment for free.

There are some dares even I'm surprised my sister will go through with.

There are some dares even I'm surprised my sister will go through with.

When sis asks me to join her live streams, it's as co-performer.

When sis asks me to join her live streams, it's as co-performer.

In the end, it wasn't hard for my daughter to convince me that she's a grown woman now.

In the end, it wasn't hard for my daughter to convince me that she's a grown woman now.

Some family pastimes, learned during the lockdown, will stick around for a long time.

Some family pastimes, learned during the lockdown, will stick around for a long time.

My parents never seem so proud of me as when I'm balls deep in mom.

My parents never seem so proud of me as when I'm balls deep in mom.

No matter how long my sister can stare at herself in the mirror, I can stare longer.

No matter how long my sister can stare at herself in the mirror, I can stare longer.

To my welcome surprise, it only took mom one day of vacation to understand why I booked us a single room.

To my welcome surprise, it only took mom one day of vacation to understand why I booked us a single room.

Big sis promised to get me in shape this school year, no matter what it takes.

Big sis promised to get me in shape this school year, no matter what it takes.

When I confessed to my aunt that I had a thing for redheads, she just replied,

When I confessed to my aunt that I had a thing for redheads, she just replied, "Then what are you waiting for?"

Recently, I walked in on what it really means to be the favorite nephew.

Recently, I walked in on what it really means to be the favorite nephew.

While her mother works late, my daughter thinks up more interesting ways to pass the time.

While her mother works late, my daughter thinks up more interesting ways to pass the time.

My cousin says the way you start the Lunar New Year is the way you'll spend the rest of it.

My cousin says the way you start the Lunar New Year is the way you'll spend the rest of it.

No matter the reason she tells my mom, aunty has only one thing in mind when she calls me over now.

No matter the reason she tells my mom, aunty has only one thing in mind when she calls me over now.

Since mom started crawling into my bed, I shouldn't be surprised at catching my sister crawling into dad's.

Since mom started crawling into my bed, I shouldn't be surprised at catching my sister crawling into dad's.

Beaches are nice, but my sister and I prefer the privacy of an indoor pool.

Beaches are nice, but my sister and I prefer the privacy of an indoor pool.

To keep me from staring awkwardly at her volleyball matches, sis knows we have to pre-game first.

To keep me from staring awkwardly at her volleyball matches, sis knows we have to pre-game first.

As the days get cooler, I'm always ready to keep my sister warm.

As the days get cooler, I'm always ready to keep my sister warm.

I may only have ten minutes between online classes, but mom makes sure I get the most out of them.

I may only have ten minutes between online classes, but mom makes sure I get the most out of them.

Through my cousins I learned: twins always take care of each other.

Through my cousins I learned: twins always take care of each other.

My cousin and I love camping. And it's easier to take just the one sleeping bag.

My cousin and I love camping. And it's easier to take just the one sleeping bag.

Some family pastimes, learned during the lockdown, will stick around for a long time.

Some family pastimes, learned during the lockdown, will stick around for a long time.

Mom would feel guilty about what we get up to together, but a few spanks seem to take care of it.

Mom would feel guilty about what we get up to together, but a few spanks seem to take care of it.

Under my big sister's tutelage, I've begun exploring many of the finer things in life.

Under my big sister's tutelage, I've begun exploring many of the finer things in life.

My cousin always manages to spice up our family retreats.

My cousin always manages to spice up our family retreats.

My sister surprised me with two presents for my birthday this year.

My sister surprised me with two presents for my birthday this year.

The summer cabin rules changed as soon as we heard our parents couldn't make it.

The summer cabin rules changed as soon as we heard our parents couldn't make it.

As the temperatures drop, mom needs even more help staying warm by the pool.

As the temperatures drop, mom needs even more help staying warm by the pool.

There are no losers in a pillow fight with mom.

There are no losers in a pillow fight with mom.

Taking my cousin on vacation is providing a welcome release for both of us.

Taking my cousin on vacation is providing a welcome release for both of us.

When my sister and I found the 1970s bed where our parents made us, we decided to recreate the scene.

When my sister and I found the 1970s bed where our parents made us, we decided to recreate the scene.

What mom lacks in hide-and-seek skills, she makes up for elsewhere.

What mom lacks in hide-and-seek skills, she makes up for elsewhere.

My aunt has a thing for old-fashioned cocktails, old-fashioned décor, and old-fashioned inbreeding.

My aunt has a thing for old-fashioned cocktails, old-fashioned décor, and old-fashioned inbreeding.

Fewer questions arise when I visit my cousin through the garden entrance.

Fewer questions arise when I visit my cousin through the garden entrance.

No matter the reason she tells my mom, aunty has only one thing in mind when she calls me over now.

No matter the reason she tells my mom, aunty has only one thing in mind when she calls me over now.

When I finally arranged to meet my long-lost half-sister in Vietnam, I had no idea about her line of work. After I found out her truth, I couldn't confess mine until I ran out of money.

When I finally arranged to meet my long-lost half-sister in Vietnam, I had no idea about her line of work. After I found out her truth, I couldn't confess mine until I ran out of money.

After any bath, mom lets me get a little dirty again.

After any bath, mom lets me get a little dirty again.

Even after the bars re-open, I won't forgo the benefits of cocktail hour at my aunt's house.

Even after the bars re-open, I won't forgo the benefits of cocktail hour at my aunt's house.

As long as I keep up the artsy veneer, mom lets me photograph her any way I want.

As long as I keep up the artsy veneer, mom lets me photograph her any way I want.

I've found that having money helps me have my sister.

I've found that having money helps me have my sister.

Whenever my sisters ask me to pick between two styles, I always like both.

Whenever my sisters ask me to pick between two styles, I always like both.

I love back-to-school shopping with my sister.

I love back-to-school shopping with my sister.

When mom got the house in the divorce, we had to celebrate.

When mom got the house in the divorce, we had to celebrate.

When it's my daughter saying we need a break from work, she's always right.

When it's my daughter saying we need a break from work, she's always right.

Once I found my long-lost half-sister, I knew I could never tell her the truth.

Once I found my long-lost half-sister, I knew I could never tell her the truth.