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Sis has gotten so desperate, I caught her slobbering on dad while he was still asleep.

Sis has gotten so desperate, I caught her slobbering on dad while he was still asleep.

I'm already glad my aunt came to visit for the summer.

I'm already glad my aunt came to visit for the summer.

Already by the second day of our family vacation, aunty had taken note of all my staring.

Already by the second day of our family vacation, aunty had taken note of all my staring.

As we got older, my sister and I replaced Saturday morning cartoons with another tradition.

As we got older, my sister and I replaced Saturday morning cartoons with another tradition.

Uncle Tony doesn't just stare at my sister anymore.

Uncle Tony doesn't just stare at my sister anymore.

My parents never seem so proud of me as when I'm balls deep in mom.

My parents never seem so proud of me as when I'm balls deep in mom.

When mom and I say we're going out for a drive, it's more like parking in a secluded area.

When mom and I say we're going out for a drive, it's more like parking in a secluded area.

Mom decided to make this Christmas unforgettable for both of us.

Mom decided to make this Christmas unforgettable for both of us.

Mom said with the money we save on A/C, she'll buy birth control.

Mom said with the money we save on A/C, she'll buy birth control.

I can't help it, but whenever I see my sister's pretty lips, I want to kiss them.

I can't help it, but whenever I see my sister's pretty lips, I want to kiss them.

When my daughter wants to spend the night in my room, she knows PJs won't cut it.

When my daughter wants to spend the night in my room, she knows PJs won't cut it.

The summer cabin rules changed as soon as we heard our parents couldn't make it.

The summer cabin rules changed as soon as we heard our parents couldn't make it.

When mommy started paying me as her personal assistant, she expected me to act like one, too.

When mommy started paying me as her personal assistant, she expected me to act like one, too.

I may only have ten minutes between online classes, but mom makes sure I get the most out of them.

I may only have ten minutes between online classes, but mom makes sure I get the most out of them.

When I take mom out for a long ride, we don't drive as far as dad thinks.

When I take mom out for a long ride, we don't drive as far as dad thinks.

My cousin always manages to spice up our family retreats.

My cousin always manages to spice up our family retreats.

When sis asks me for a foot massage, we both know it won't end there.

When sis asks me for a foot massage, we both know it won't end there.

The Tuscan sun looks good on my sister.

The Tuscan sun looks good on my sister.

As long as I keep up the artsy veneer, mom lets me photograph her any way I want.

As long as I keep up the artsy veneer, mom lets me photograph her any way I want.

When your girlfriend is still a virgin, but your mom isn't.

When your girlfriend is still a virgin, but your mom isn't.

Fewer questions arise when I visit my cousin through the garden entrance.

Fewer questions arise when I visit my cousin through the garden entrance.

When I confessed to my aunt that I had a thing for redheads, she just replied,

When I confessed to my aunt that I had a thing for redheads, she just replied, "Then what are you waiting for?"

In our house, when one door closes, a bathrobe opens.

In our house, when one door closes, a bathrobe opens.

No matter the reason she tells my mom, aunty has only one thing in mind when she calls me over now.

No matter the reason she tells my mom, aunty has only one thing in mind when she calls me over now.

Mom says she's much comfier sitting on my lap these days.

Mom says she's much comfier sitting on my lap these days.

The summer cabin rules changed as soon as we heard our parents couldn't make it.

The summer cabin rules changed as soon as we heard our parents couldn't make it.

I wonder if dad will ever realize that it's not food I'm picking out of my teeth at the dinner table.

I wonder if dad will ever realize that it's not food I'm picking out of my teeth at the dinner table.

I can only imagine the mix of anxiousness and excitement when mom told my virgin brother about his birthday present this year.

I can only imagine the mix of anxiousness and excitement when mom told my virgin brother about his birthday present this year.

No matter how long my sister can stare at herself in the mirror, I can stare longer.

No matter how long my sister can stare at herself in the mirror, I can stare longer.

Every trip to the park with my cousin comes with a happy ending.

Every trip to the park with my cousin comes with a happy ending.

When sis asked what I wanted as a cheap birthday present, I could only think of one thing.

When sis asked what I wanted as a cheap birthday present, I could only think of one thing.

As the temperatures drop, mom needs even more help staying warm by the pool.

As the temperatures drop, mom needs even more help staying warm by the pool.

Beaches are nice, but my sister and I prefer the privacy of an indoor pool.

Beaches are nice, but my sister and I prefer the privacy of an indoor pool.

Before even arriving at the first hotel, sis wanted to start bonding on our summer road trip.

Before even arriving at the first hotel, sis wanted to start bonding on our summer road trip.

My cousin always manages to spice up our family retreats.

My cousin always manages to spice up our family retreats.

It's always a good sign when mom throws the red silk sheets on.

It's always a good sign when mom throws the red silk sheets on.

Not many guys can handle my sister. But I love trying.

Not many guys can handle my sister. But I love trying.

As we got older, my sister and I replaced Saturday morning cartoons with another tradition.

As we got older, my sister and I replaced Saturday morning cartoons with another tradition.

Since mom started crawling into my bed, I shouldn't be surprised at catching my sister crawling into dad's.

Since mom started crawling into my bed, I shouldn't be surprised at catching my sister crawling into dad's.

Aunty feels a little embarrassed about having to crash in my tiny apartment. And what I ask for in return.

Aunty feels a little embarrassed about having to crash in my tiny apartment. And what I ask for in return.

As we got older, my sister and I replaced Saturday morning cartoons with another tradition.

As we got older, my sister and I replaced Saturday morning cartoons with another tradition.

When mom declared a month-without-TV rule, she did offer alternatives.

When mom declared a month-without-TV rule, she did offer alternatives.

Once we grew up, sis and I pushed the twin beds together.

Once we grew up, sis and I pushed the twin beds together.

While dad is busy watching football every Sunday, I get to score with mom.

While dad is busy watching football every Sunday, I get to score with mom.

My mom can be a bit smothering at times, but in a very good way.

My mom can be a bit smothering at times, but in a very good way.

I think mom knew what she was doing when she put bro and Aunt Becky in the same room over the holidays.

I think mom knew what she was doing when she put bro and Aunt Becky in the same room over the holidays.

When sis has a long day at school, I'm always ready as a stress reliever.

When sis has a long day at school, I'm always ready as a stress reliever.

I'm diggin' my cousin's rebellious streak.

I'm diggin' my cousin's rebellious streak.

I'll have to think of more ways to reward my sister's BJ skills, since I'm running out of medals.

I'll have to think of more ways to reward my sister's BJ skills, since I'm running out of medals.

After any bath, mom lets me get a little dirty again.

After any bath, mom lets me get a little dirty again.

When sis signed up for the class I'm TA'ing, she knew just what extra assignments to ask for.

When sis signed up for the class I'm TA'ing, she knew just what extra assignments to ask for.

I've been getting good vibes from my cousin all summer.

I've been getting good vibes from my cousin all summer.

"This is the part where you get undressed too, nephew."

It takes mom forever to get dressed in the morning. Especially when I'm convincing her not to.

It takes mom forever to get dressed in the morning. Especially when I'm convincing her not to.

When sis signed up for the class I'm TA'ing, she knew just what extra assignments to ask for.

When sis signed up for the class I'm TA'ing, she knew just what extra assignments to ask for.

After salsa lessons, aunty offered to show me the horizontal tango.

After salsa lessons, aunty offered to show me the horizontal tango.

It may be Weird Science, but if I had futuristic technology, I would use it to create the perfect big sister.

It may be Weird Science, but if I had futuristic technology, I would use it to create the perfect big sister.

Mom's always saying: two is the perfect number of sons.

Mom's always saying: two is the perfect number of sons.

When I finally arranged to meet my long-lost half-sister in Vietnam, I had no idea about her line of work. After I found out her truth, I couldn't confess mine until I ran out of money.

When I finally arranged to meet my long-lost half-sister in Vietnam, I had no idea about her line of work. After I found out her truth, I couldn't confess mine until I ran out of money.

When she finally gave in to me, I think sis was a little afraid of how much she liked it.

When she finally gave in to me, I think sis was a little afraid of how much she liked it.

When mom and sis team up, they give me the best birthday presents.

When mom and sis team up, they give me the best birthday presents.

Before I take Auntie out to dinner, I make sure she's ready for what follows.

Before I take Auntie out to dinner, I make sure she's ready for what follows.

I let my daughter do all the decorating, and she lets me do other things.

I let my daughter do all the decorating, and she lets me do other things.

Sis knows I have a sweet tooth.

Sis knows I have a sweet tooth.

When my daughter wants to spend the night in my room, she knows PJs won't cut it.

When my daughter wants to spend the night in my room, she knows PJs won't cut it.

Aunty knows I can keep a secret.

Aunty knows I can keep a secret.

When mom sees me making plans with girls, she asks: Why go out for hamburger when you've got steak at home?

When mom sees me making plans with girls, she asks: Why go out for hamburger when you've got steak at home?

Mom likes it when I hug her from the back, too.

Mom likes it when I hug her from the back, too.

Mom promised me a kiss at our home New Year's party, and I got to pick where.

Mom promised me a kiss at our home New Year's party, and I got to pick where.

When my daughter wants to spend the night in my room, she knows PJs won't cut it.

When my daughter wants to spend the night in my room, she knows PJs won't cut it.

Mom's always saying: two is the perfect number of sons.

Mom's always saying: two is the perfect number of sons.

When my sister asked for free guitar lessons, she offered to give a few pointers on my fingering in exchange.

When my sister asked for free guitar lessons, she offered to give a few pointers on my fingering in exchange.

Since my daughter found a book about Geisha, we've discovered all new interests together.

Since my daughter found a book about Geisha, we've discovered all new interests together.

Together for the holidays, it's great to watch Nana appreciate mom almost as much as I do.

Together for the holidays, it's great to watch Nana appreciate mom almost as much as I do.

Mom likes it when I hug her from the back, too.

Mom likes it when I hug her from the back, too.

Uncle Tony doesn't just stare at my sister anymore.

Uncle Tony doesn't just stare at my sister anymore.

"You're not going to sleep all day cousin, right?"

As we got older, my sister and I replaced Saturday morning cartoons with another tradition.

As we got older, my sister and I replaced Saturday morning cartoons with another tradition.

Breakfast is when my sister starts to tease me for the day.

Breakfast is when my sister starts to tease me for the day.

No matter how long my sister can stare at herself in the mirror, I can stare longer.

No matter how long my sister can stare at herself in the mirror, I can stare longer.

Being known as the fun uncle just gets more rewarding over time.

Being known as the fun uncle just gets more rewarding over time.

After a yummy dinner at my aunt and uncle's, it was time to explore my cousin's room.

After a yummy dinner at my aunt and uncle's, it was time to explore my cousin's room.

When mom and I say we're going out for a drive, it's more like parking in a secluded area.

When mom and I say we're going out for a drive, it's more like parking in a secluded area.

When my daughter wants to spend the night in my room, she knows PJs won't cut it.

When my daughter wants to spend the night in my room, she knows PJs won't cut it.

Sis was never the sharpest nail in the bin, but I don't mind pounding a little harder.

Sis was never the sharpest nail in the bin, but I don't mind pounding a little harder.

Once she gave him the go-ahead, my cousin really started feasting on mom.

Once she gave him the go-ahead, my cousin really started feasting on mom.

At the last pool party of the summer, I finally convinced my sister to FreeTheNipple.

At the last pool party of the summer, I finally convinced my sister to FreeTheNipple.

Uncle Tony doesn't just stare at my sister anymore.

Uncle Tony doesn't just stare at my sister anymore.

It's really hard to focus on school with my horny big sis still in the house.

It's really hard to focus on school with my horny big sis still in the house.

The Tuscan sun looks good on my sister.

The Tuscan sun looks good on my sister.

Mom said with the money we save on A/C, she'll buy birth control.

Mom said with the money we save on A/C, she'll buy birth control.

Uncle Tony doesn't just stare at my sister anymore.

Uncle Tony doesn't just stare at my sister anymore.

I've always thought of aunty as a big ball of fun.

I've always thought of aunty as a big ball of fun.

I only take long, steamy showers when mom's at home.

I only take long, steamy showers when mom's at home.

Since mom started crawling into my bed, I shouldn't be surprised at catching my sister crawling into dad's.

Since mom started crawling into my bed, I shouldn't be surprised at catching my sister crawling into dad's.

Seeing the fall leaves is just an excuse for mom and I to be alone.

Seeing the fall leaves is just an excuse for mom and I to be alone.

My sister has decided to wear a mask even at home now, given all the D variants I'm exposing her to.

My sister has decided to wear a mask even at home now, given all the D variants I'm exposing her to.

When I caught sis stealing my lotion, I insisted on applying it to her myself.

When I caught sis stealing my lotion, I insisted on applying it to her myself.

When I realized how handsy my aunt gets when she drinks, I offered to build her a bar.

When I realized how handsy my aunt gets when she drinks, I offered to build her a bar.

Fewer questions arise when I visit my cousin through the garden entrance.

Fewer questions arise when I visit my cousin through the garden entrance.